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It's amazing what women can do together

2/15/2016

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OK let's face it. Losing weight and getting healthy is a noble goal,  but it's tough to keep it up on your own.
That's why 36 Westbrook teachers have banded together this winter, forming their own mini-version of the popular TV show "The Biggest Loser" to encourage and motivate each other to lose weight and embrace healthier lifestyles. Since the first weigh-in on Jan. 4th, the group has dropped a total of 150 pounds and shows no signs of letting up. The biggest loser so far has lost 12.5 pounds, but it's anyone's guess who will win the top prize when the contest ends on March 7th. The contest spans nine weeks, but only eight weigh-ins because of February vacation.
The contest is the brainchild of Westbrook Middle School art teacher Liz Egan, who participated in similar challenges at Shoreline Health & Fitness in Clinton and the ValleyShore YMCA in Westbrook. Egan sent a letter to teachers in late December outlining the challenge and was thrilled when 36 teachers took her up on it _ 16 high school teachers and 10 from the middle school Here's how it works: each teacher puts $10 into the pot and receives $1 back if they lose weight at each weigh-in, which are held every Monday morning in a closet in the health office at the middle school. Each person is responsible for their own weigh-in and the contest is done anonymously, with each contestant assigned a number. Weights are posted, but no one knows who's who and it's all done on t he honor system.
"It's way more fun to lose weight and exercise with other people than it is do to it on your own," said Becky Honan, a nurse at Westbrook Middle School. "This contest is bringing a lot of people together and we're supporting each other." An added bonus, organizers say, is teachers and support staff  are meeting other people in the district, making new friends and plans to exercise together.
Studies show that a group approach to weight loss and exercise _ think Weight Watchers _ is significantly more effective than going it alone. People enrolled in weight and exercise programs with friends are more likely to stick to the program, sharing tips on diet and exercise, at least in the beginning. The long-term effects of group weight loss programs are harder to quantify, according to the American Psychological Association.
The contest has included several exercise classes and healthy lifestyle seminars that are open to the entire school district. They have had two boot camps, a yoga class and are even taking nutrition seminars, including one on how to build a salad in a jar. About a half-dozen women attended a yoga class in the Mulvey Center gymnasium last week, stretching, lunging and contorting their frames to strengthen and tone their bodies. 
The biggest loser will receive 60 percent of the pot, while the second place finisher will receive 30 percent of the pot and the third place finisher will receive 10 percent of the pot. Contestants don't know this yet, but Egan plans to launch a second contest _ Countdown to Summer _ once the first contest is over. That contest will cost $15 and span the weeks ramaining to the end of the school year.

Above are some of the teachers participating in the challenge. Good luck ladies! 
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July 18th...Chaffinch Island Park

12/18/2014

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You've got to love Weather.com.
With Saturday's class quickly approaching, I looked out the window around 6 a.m. and seeing wet pavement, figured I should check in with Weather.com. With zero percent chance of rain in the forecast _ hey, you can't get more definitive than that! _ I headed over to the class eager to share poses to open the third, or throat, chakra. There was a light sprinkle as I drove toward Chaffinch Island Park and I thought about nearby shelters: the overhang near the entrance of Calvin Leete School or the famous gazebo at the Guilford Fairgrounds where my son asked his girlfriend to go to the senior prom.
And then I decided to stop trying to control the situation and just deal with everything as it unfolded. That's really all any of us can do in life, and I was happy to take my yoga off my mat instead of focus on the negatives or why nots. Four students awaited me as I rolled into the parking lot, and they didn't seem that fazed by the situation despite rumbles of thunder in the distance throughout the class.  They even put up with a light sprinkle, but as they fittingly headed into their second locust, they told me they saw lightning in the distance. We barely had time to pick up our mats and run to the cars before the skies opened up.
As the sound of rain pelted my Honda CRV, we closed our eyes and ended the class in the car. It wasn't glamorous and it wasn't pretty, but at the heart of it is yoga: dealing with what you're faced with in the moment and letting your breath be your ultimate guide. I'm still damp from the experience, but I thank my students Michelle, Carol (above) Sherri and Patsy for coming out in the rain and sharing this experience with me.
P.S. Here are two quotes I wanted to share (my notebook fell during the sprint to the car so I didn't have it in front of me at the end of class):


"Rest is not idleness, and to lie sometimes in the grass under trees on a summer's day, listening to the murmur of the water, or watching the clouds float across the sky is by no means a waste of time."
_ John Lubbock


"Listening is a positive act. You have to put yourself out to do it."




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Look to the Rubber Ducky

11/6/2014

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Ever since I read a wonderful book about yoga themes last year, I cannot help myself. As a longtime writer, I appreciate a great theme, so the chances are if you come to one of my classes, you are going to get a theme, or in yoga-speak intention, to go along with the poses. One of my favorites over the past few months has been the rubber ducky. Let me elaborate. During a road trip down South in April, we stayed in a motel in North Carolina that had a little rubber duck sitting on the bureau. The instructions were simple: Take the rubber duck with you and snap a picture of where the duck ends up. I think the motel staff has probably gotten a lot of shots of Disney World and other tourist destinations in the South. But last week, my rubber duck ended up on the beach at the Mercy Center as a central character in my class. You see, just like me and my students that day, the duck ended up on the sand. The question for the duck _ and in all honesty everyone _  isn't where it ended up though; it's where the duck is headed. Like the duck, we're all on a journey and sometimes, it's a good idea to take a look at what's working and what isn't. The Summer Solstice is a perfect time for self-assessment. Since the Winter Solstice in December, we've all been on an outward journey leading to the Summer Solstice. But once the Summer Solstice occurs, we begin the journey inward, so it's an ideal time to examine what is good in our lives and brings joy, and what is negative and brings sadness and depression. What and who in your life makes your soul sing, and who or what in your life is a downer? As part of my Summer Solstice class, I asked students to think of all the positives in their lives and what they could do to cultivate them. On the flip side, they were asked to think of some negatives _ things they could let go of to make room for better days. Where will you and the duck end up when the Winter Solstice rolls around? 

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Embrace Plan B

4/6/2014

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 I bumped into a friend a few weeks ago and she shared that she was planning a wedding for her son who was about to be a parent in his early 20s. Though she told me she was stressed out by the news and all the trappings that go with planning a last-minute wedding and readying for an infant, I was excited by her impending role of grandmother and told her I guessed this was Plan B.
 Though I was thrilled by the prospect of her Plan B, I realized that I often have trouble embracing the road less traveled in my own life. I often envision that things should be a certain way and people will act in certain ways when more often than not things don't pan out as I'd hoped. When they don't, I'm just as likely as the next person to get sad, angry and frustrated that Plan A blew up in my face. Usually the only thing that turns things around is thinking about how much of my life _ and probably everyone else's _ is really Plan B.
 As much as we'd like to think that we're in control of our own destiny, so much about life and where it takes us is out of our hands. The trick is learning to recognize when Plan A is not working and embracing Plan B.  In yoga speak, it's called non-clinging or letting go of that which no longer serves you to make room for something positive in your life. Yes, this is often easier said than done, but usually good things happen when you stop clinging to the notion of the way things ought to be. Just think about how much energy is wasted bemoaning rotten relationships, horrible bosses or fair weather friends.
 Realizing when to let go of Plan A and embarking on Plan B is sometimes the trickiest part. If you happen to be a control freak, it may take you a little longer to realize it's time to let go. But ask yourself if the thing you are clinging to is really worth it and if it isn't, let it go and make room for something that truly is.

The power of positive people and positive words

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So I'm back after a long hiatus and it feels great to be writing my blog again. I feel best when I'm writing, be it a blog post or a slice of life story for a local newspaper, because it means I'm using that creative part of my brain that makes me feel I'm operating on all cylinders. How do I feel when I'm not writing? Like something's missing, but I can't put my finger on it. Or like my old brown Volkswagen Bug chugging across the Bourne Bridge with a faulty set of spark plugs.

I stopped writing every day when my kids were young and I decided to stay home with them. I freelanced a little, but writing becomes increasingly difficult when you're not doing it every day. It's something like running. If you only do it occasionally, it is painful every time you go, but if you do it often, it becomes second nature. 

What brought me back to the keyboard? A student in my yoga class on Saturday told me she read my blog and liked it. It was that simple. A few words of encouragement was all it took to snap my dry spell. I bring this up because we really hold a lot of power in our words. We can use them to encourage people and lift them up, or criticize them and drag them down. Think about how great you feel after you get a compliment and how lousy you feel when someone criticizes you, no matter how well meaning it may be.



Think about it. When was the last time you gave a compliment, or got one? If it's been awhile, you know what I'm talking about. Now think about the last time someone criticized you. It happened to me a few weeks ago, and it still stings a little bit. I'm always a little leery when I see the person. OK, what now?

Teaching yoga has really illustrated this point to me. Though yoga teachers love to correct students for improper alignment, many students get very self-conscious when they are adjusted, particularly several times in the same class. As a student, I have left yoga classes feeling that the teacher was picking on me when I was just trying to get a little Zen. It's a fine line. You don't want students going into poses and getting hurt, but you shouldn't criticize so much that they are thinking about their form _ and the fact that they have been called out in front of the entire class _  at the expense of their breathing or relaxation.

Teaching yoga has also given me insight into the power of positive thinking and words. Though everyone is dealing with issues, students' breath and the poses become their focus when they get on their mats. With a few words of encouragement from me and fellow students, they tackle poses that they think are out of reach...and their hearts soar when they realize they can actually do them. That is really the joy of teaching yoga...to see people achieve what they thought was impossible.

So to the student whose compliment brought me back to writing, I say 'thank you.' And if you get a chance to give a compliment, do it. You never know where it might lead. 








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Hello, I must be going . . . 

6/8/2013

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Have you ever walked out of a movie because you just couldn't stand it any more, or stopped reading a book because it wasn't worth the investment of your time? I felt like doing that in a yoga class I took the other day. I knew it was the wrong fit when I walked in, unrolled my mat and sat down. I sat quietly waiting for the class to start while the other students began restlessly popping into poses without warming up. They wanted to move and sweat while I wanted to breathe, realign and relax. 


Things went from bad to worse about five minutes into the class. A burst of heat from a vent overhead washed over my body, giving me a head rush. I asked teacher if it was any cooler in the front of the class.  Her terse  response: "It's not even hot yet." Sadly, she was right. As the room took on the temperature of a sauna, the sweat began pouring off everyone's bodies onto the mats and floor. I soon lost track of my breath. I find it hard to stay focused on breathing when I'm just trying not to pass out. I thought about leaving several times but regretfully stuck it out, inserting about a half-dozen child poses into the mix while the rest of the class soldiered on.


It is hard for me to believe that class is anyone's idea of yoga. It wasn't mindful, and I don't think there was ever a mention of breath.  To me it was just a sweat box, a glorified exercise class. To be fair, everyone else in the class seemed to love it, even the college-age girl next to me toweling off every 2 seconds and her mother who was trying so hard to keep up with her. I wanted to leave and should have left. And if that ever happens in a class again, I will. 

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Discovering the Joys of Gentle Yoga

4/4/2013

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A few weeks ago I was in yoga class when my longtime teacher implored us to "trust" our yoga. Easy to do when things are going well. Not so easy when they're not.

The past several months have been trying to say the least.  Just when I got my yoga teaching certificate last summer, my joints began to rebel.  As the joint pain became worse, I became increasingly upset and anxious about it.  What is that line about God laughing when you make plans? Well, that's really how it felt.

A mild form of rheumatoid arthritis that I had been battling for a few years decided to throw a wrench into all my plans, leaving me with incredibly painful swollen joints. Particularly hard hit were my knees, which developed huge Baker's cysts behind them that felt like bricks. The cysts made getting into certain yoga poses, such as the delightfully relaxing Child's Pose and the deep knee bend of Garland Pose,  impossible. I found myself deleting poses that focused on kneeling in classes that I taught. Instead of breathing into poses and relaxing during classes I'd take, I'd silently curse my teachers for including so many kneeling poses.

Though I grimmaced and groaned through many classes, I gradually made some adjustments. My Child's Pose began to look more like Rabbit, where your backside remains in the air while your forehead presses into the mat. I also began to rely on props such as blocks and blankets. One or two blocks under my buttocks helped take some of the pressure off my beleaguered knees during Hero's pose. Strategically placed blankets under my knees also helped.

Things started improving for me physically when I cut gluten, sugar and dairy out of my diet about four months ago. The so-called anti-inflammatory diet has eliminated nearly all of my joint pain, though it still erupts if I'm under stress. Which brings me back to the "trusting" yoga part. Though I've always loved physically demanding classes, I find myself going to Gentle Yoga classes and exploring new studios these days. While often dismissed as the wimpy stepchild by the power yoga crowd, Gentle Yoga is just what I need these days. One of my favorite new classes is held mid-day at a new studio in nearby Old Saybrook.  It's a pretty space off Main Street with bamboo floors, an industrial ceiling and funky Indian-inspired quilts hanging on the walls. With the heat cranking and Indian music softly playing, we are guided into poses by our teacher, whose voice is as calming as a cup of Chamomile tea. I particularly look forward to Savasana, or Corpse Pose, when she brushes our forehead and temples with essential oils. 

After an hour, I emerge from the class with flushed cheeks, feeling as though I've just been in a sauna or had a massage _ or both. I was so mellow the first time I left the class that I started driving in the wrong direction for several minutes before I realized it.  One of the other students who took the class said the world would be a better place if everyone took a Gentle Yoga class during the middle of the day. I can't argue with that. In fact, after months of feeling like a New York City cabdriver with my road rage _ the result of schlepping two kids nearly 25,000 miles in less than one year _ I'm a little calmer behind the wheel. It's not all yoga to be sure, but as they say with chicken soup and colds, it certainly can't hurt.






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Take Some Time to Nurture Yourself

10/1/2012

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I was in Kohl's when I overheard an older woman tell a friend that she feels guilty when she sits down and reads a book.

I used to feel that way. In fact, I could never really sit still when I was home, always popping up from the couch or outdoor lounge chair when a chore occurred to me. But I have changed a lot over the past few years, and one of the things I never feel guilty about is reading, which I thoroughly enjoy. I don't find time to do it during the school year, but when the kids are off for the summer, I often indulge in a good read during the middle the day.


Reading makes me very happy. And as I learned in yoga school, we all need to bring a little more joy into our lives without feeling guilty. Most women, including me, are people pleasers. But if we don't take time out for ourselves, it can lead to burn-out, frustration, anger and sadness.

We learned a lot about yoga during training, but one of the best things I learned was from guest teacher Colleen Breeckner. During her lecture, she asked us to list the relationships and roles in our lives beginning with our most important ones.  I saved my notes. Here's what I wrote that day: "Loving mother, loving wife, writer, loving and caring daughter, sister and aunt, yoga teacher, good friend, good listener, faithful parishioner (well, sometimes), loyal and loved dog owner, tennis player, compassionate person, giving person.


As we went around the room and listened to some students' lists, there was a common theme. Most people listed their relationships with their spouse, significant other or kids are their top priority. But Breeckner was quick to point out that we had missed the boat. The most important relationship, aside from our relationship with a higher power, is our relationship with ourselves.


 This revelation reminded me of a conversation I had about a year ago with a group of women at a neighborhood party. When I asked one of the women how she was handling the start of the empty nest, another neighbor piped in, "Well, Donna (named changed)  would never feel that way because she's always done a great job of nurturing herself." I thought about that for a long time, and realized since I had become a mother 15 years ago, I had not been nurturing myself nearly enough. 

At the urging a a friend who asked what I was doing with my camera lately (um, nothing), I bought a new Nikon and decided to take a photography course. The following month, I enrolled in yoga school to fulfill a longtime desire to learn more about yoga. "I know yoga works for me, but I want to understand why it does," I told my husband. "If nothing else, I'll be in a better place mentally and physically at the end of training.."


The mental part worked. Taking the class snapped me out of a funk I had been battling for months. The physical part, not so much.  Increasing my yoga practice to teach has been tough on my body.  As my husband often tells me, "Have you looked at the date on your driver's license lately?"


Point taken.  But I don't regret training the spotlight on myself a little more in the past year. Deprivation is never a good feeling.  As Breeckner told us, "Sometimes I congratulate people for making it to yoga class because they have made it a priority." I didn't get it then, but after teaching for a few months I do. Yoga is the first thing people drop when they are feeling pressed for time when  it is the last thing they should be giving up.  Breathing, bending, stretching and getting into poses that you never thought possible is a great way to get in touch with yourself.


If you've been off your mat for some time, come back.
















 


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A Very, Very Happy Ending

9/12/2012

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Sometimes you hear stories that make your skin tingle.
This happened to me the other day at the end of my Fabulous Yoga Arms class, when I learned that one of my students was getting married, and wanted to tone her arms because she's wearing a strapless gown. She's not so different from any other bride except that she's in her late 50s. I soon learned that she was marrying her high school  sweetheart 40 years after their first meeting. Both had previous marriages _ hers ended when her first husband died suddenly. She spent many years alone before hooking up with her old boyfriend, probably after years of  wondering if she would ever find love again.

I love everything about this story, from the bride and her friend griping about her  inept wedding planner to the bride's desire for a big wedding complete with a tent and catered dinner at her summer home and her friends flying in from all over the country for the ceremony. Yes, I am an incurable romantic, always have been. I love romantic comedies _ the intriguing banter between couples at the outset of a romance, the courting, wondering whether there will be a kiss at the door (I'm also incurably old-fashioned), all of it. I especially love when people find love in middle age or beyond after they've suffered heartache and loss. It's proof that the heart can be broken, but not destroyed. It is solid proof that if you hang in there, you might just find a happy ending.

Maybe it's the change in seasons, but I've talked to a few people lately who are down _ unhappy with the way their life is going and their prospects for the future. One friend complained that he will never find love. Another griped about being without a job and bored out of her mind. When I asked both if they were doing yoga, they said they were not. That's probably why they fell into these negative thought patterns _ lamenting the past, worrying about the future, and definitely not staying with their breath or in the present moment. We all fall prey to it _ yes, I'm guilty as charged as well.

One of my yoga teachers ended a class with a great exercise for remembering to breathe _ five breaths an hour.  She urged us to try to do it every hour to stay with our breath. It's not easy _ try it and you'll be amazed how hard it is to remember to stay with your breath throughout the day.  But it's a potent reminder that our breath is really the only constant we have in our lives, and that when we stay with it, we are calmer and can enjoy exactly where we are.

I read a quote that I love on the Jiva Yoga Facebook page, a wonderful resource of inspiration in one of my favorite places, Hilton Head Island, S.C. "Holding on to anything is like holding on to your breath. You will suffocate. The only way to get anything in the physical universe is by letting go of it. Let go and it will be yours forever." _ Deepak Chopra





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Nature Is A Great Teacher

8/8/2012

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Beautiful blooms line the beach meadow.
Sometimes nature can put things in perspective like nothing else.


A month ago, I was on Martha's Vineyard hoping to see the glorious pink  flowers that line the meadow en route to the beach. Sure, they are never out in early July, but I thought they might have bloomed early like everything in my garden in Guilford. No such luck.


Fast-forward four weeks and they were blooming in all their splendor: saucer-sized bright pink blooms with a crown of gold in the center resembling cosmos on steroids. I always thought they were beach roses, but on closer inspection I believe they are in the hibiscus family. Each year, they are in full bloom in early August, ushering in the second half of summer along with foggy afternoons, striped bass  on the grill and snarled roads.


One of things I love most about the beach meadow flanking Chilmark Pond is it is always changing with the seasons. In the summer, it is a vivid tapestry of bright pinks and greens while in the fall, it is soft yellows, golds and pale greens. The winter brings burnished browns and ambers while in the spring it begins to come alive again with subtle greens and yellows.


For me, the meadow is a reminder that everything has a season that cannot be forced or manipulated by will or desire. It's a reminder to take things as they come, resist the need to control what I cannot and to go with the flow, easing up on myself and others. In yoga, it's called staying present moment. And sometimes something as simple as a pink flower is what we need to remind us to do just that. 

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Make the Best of Things

7/28/2012

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My friend Barbara meditates on a brighter beach day.
There is a line in a Bruce Springsteen song that says, "Some day we'll look back on this and it will all seem funny."


That line kept popping in my head today after leading my third yoga beach class at Hammonasset Beach State Park in Madison. The previous two classes were well attended under glorious skies. This one was marred by lousy weather and thunder, which began clapping just as the class was about to begin.


Though the class was technically supposed to be canceled in thunder, I and the handful of students who showed up were eager to have the class. The staff at the Nature Center was gracious and accommodating, moving benches and relocating reptiles so we could have the class indoors. But with a steady flow of parents and toddlers eager to look at snakes and turtles, it quickly became apparent that we would need alternate quarters.


One of the students suggested going downstairs, where more snakes, turtles and gurgling tanks lined the walls. The staff said it was OK as long as we could ignore the vocal parakeet near the front of the room. The setting wasn't ideal, but it made for some interesting cues: "Turn your body toward the snake," was my favorite. I've got to give my students a lot of credit. Besides the less than ideal setting, they ignored the bugs crawling on the floor, the damp concrete floor and the pesky biting flies. And to our surprise, the parakeet was fairly cooperative, only letting out an occasional squawk.


Such are the pitfalls of outdoor yoga. No matter how many times you check Weather.com and scan the sky, you simply can't count on the weather and have to approach it with an open mind. That is what I love about yoga _ dealing with the cards in front of you and making the best of any situation. I just hope next time it doesn't involve flies.



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    Carolyn is a longtime writer and editor who recently became a certified yoga instructor. You can follow her journey into the world of yoga teaching and share your comments if you'd like. 

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